Rasa: MotherGod as I sat before your Eminence I asked you the following,
'Do you want me to have a friend?'
And you said,
MOTHERGOD: I WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND, PUT NO OTHERS BEFORE ME.
Rasa: Does that mean you do not want me to look for an intimate friend,
with whom I can share all my concerns?
MOTHERGOD: THERE IS NO ONE ON EARTH THAT CAN BE YOUR FRIEND THE WAY I CAN,
AND THE LESS YOU CONCERN YOURSELF ABOUT FINDING HUMAN FRIENDSHIP THE HAPPIER
AND MORE FREE, YOU WILL BE.
Rasa: Mother, that has been a cry of mine for so many years, and yet you
closed the door of friendship in my face. It seemed you left me al alone in
the world and I have suffered. Time and again you would not hear my plea,
and when I persisted, a person would appear is if in friendship and would
turn out to be unsuitable. What is the message here, what are you leading
me to?
MOTHERGOD: I AM YOUR ONLY FRIEND.
Rasa:
Define friend.
MOTHERGOD: ONE WHO WILL BE WITH YOU THROUGH THICK AND THIN, RICH OR POOR,
POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE TIMES, UNCONDITIONAL, ALWAYS THERE, BE WILLING TO
SACRIFICE FOR YOU, DO ANYTHING FOR YOU, NOT JUDGE YOU, NEVER CONDEMN YOU AND
ALWAYS WISHING NO HARM AND ONLY THE BEST. THERE IS NO PERSON ON EARTH THAT
CAN DO THAT FOR YOU, ONLY I CAN, SO STOP LOOKING. I AM A JEALOUS GOD, ONE
WHO SAYS TO YOU THAT YOU MUST GIVE ALL OF YOURSELF TO ME, AND I WILL GIVE
ALL OF MYSELF TO YOU.
HAVE YOU FINALLY GOT IT, MY DAUGHTER? THERE WAS NEVER NOR WILL THERE EVER
BE, A HUMAN TO TAKE MY PLACE. THAT IS THE DEFINITION OF LOVING GOD WITH ALL
ONE'S HEART, SOUL, MIND AND STRENGTH. WHEN YOU LOOK TO MORTALS FOR WHAT THEY
CANNOT GIVE, YOU ARE ON A WILD GOOSE CHASE. NO SATISFACTION WILL BE GIVEN,
YOU WILL BE ON DRY DESERT GROUND AND NO WELLS WITH WATER. ONLY I CAN GIVE
YOU WHAT YOU WANT AND NEED, AND LEST YOU SURRENDER EVERY BIT OF YOURSELF TO
ME, YOU WILL ONLY GET ME PIECEMEAL. GOD IS INDEED A VERY JEALOUS GOD.
CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER HOW FREE AND HAPPY YOU WER IN THE MANY TIMES PAST, DEEP
IN SADHANAS, WHEN YOU NEEDED NO ONE AND NOTHING? I WANT YOU TO BE THERE AT
ALL TIMES, FURTHERMORE, YOU CANNOT BE A GREAT AND HAPPY GURU TO YOUR
DEVOTEES LEST YOU FOLLOW THIS AXIOM. IF YOU LOOK TO DEVOTEES FOR STRENGTH IN
ANY WAY OR SUPPORT YOU WILL BE HIGHLY DISSAPOINTED, THEY WILL ALWAYS, ALWAYS
LET YOU DOWN, AS CHILDREN DO. ONCE IN A WHILE THEY WILL COME THROUGH, BUT
THAT IS OCCASIONAL. TO EVEN THINK ABOUT THEM IS A DOWNER, HELP THEM AND
FORGET IT.
Rasa: There is something profound being said here, and it is monumental. Do
you mean to tell me Mother, that in order to be a Great Soul one cannot even
have an intimate friend? It does seem extreme to mortal ears. Here we come
to definitions of friendships. I know that I am allowed to be acquainted
with people and to converse with them within reason, and the people I do
converse with are friends. Last night I had the fortune of speaking to a
Holy Women for three hours. She called me, and we spoke of God the whole
time. Surely you do not want me to be closed to such conversations and the
intercourse with friends who work on Matriarchy? What is it that you want
and don't want, exactly?
MOTHERGOD: IT IS YOUR MIND I WANT. I DO NOT WANT YOUR MIND TO CRAVE,
DESIRE, OR YEARN FOR HUMANS AT ALL, I WANT YOU TO BE FREE FROM THEM,
COMPLETELY IMMERSED IN ME ALONE, AS YOUR PRIMARY SOURCE OF FRIENDSHIP,
SOLACE AND STRENGTH. IF YOU NOW AND AGAIN DISCOURSE WITH HUMANS, ALWAYS BE
AWARE THERE ARE LIMITATIONS. THEY GIVE YOU SOMETHING, YOU GIVE THEM
SOMETHING, BUT IT IS NOT THE SAME AS WHAT YOU HAVE WITH ME.
Rasa: One imagines there are people on earth who have intimate partners
with whom they do great things for God and Mission, I have read about such
things.
MOTHERGOD: THERE ARE SOME CASES WHERE IT IS FITTING AND RIGHT FOR
PARTNERSHIPS, IN YOUR CASE, IT WILL NOT BE SO. YOU HAVE TO WORK ALONE, BE
ALONE, AS A LEADER AND AS A SOLITARY BIRD. YOU ARE A PROPHET AND A SEER, AND
TOO MUCH INTERCOURSE WITH HUMANS WILL SLOW YOU DOWN AND DIM YOUR VISION.
Rasa: Can I really live that way? For a while I was depressed from lack of
company.
MOTHERGOD: YOU WERE DEPRESSED BECAUSE YOU WERE NOT PUTTING IN THE HOUR A
DAY ON PRAYER.
Rasa: I think I do get it. I noticed yesterday as I spoke with the Holy
Lady, how I restrained myself by grace toward proffering my human needs and
opinions. I let her speak because I knew she was worthy, and gave her a
chance to express herself, with little interference from me. It was you,
MotherGod, sitting in me and I was in Witness Consciousness, and so, I
behaved myself.
But at other times, when I have not been in Witness Consciousness, I
expressed human needs and weaknesses, and it was a mess, and not
satisfactory at all, and I felt I had lowered myself to the human level.
MOTHERGOD: IT IS THAT HUMAN LEVEL THAT MAKES YOU SUFFER;: WHY HAVE YOU GOT
TO BE THERE? YOU ARE ABOVE THAT, AND ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS THAT HOUR A DAY
AND YOUR MYSTICAL ANTENNAS WILL BE IN TUNE WITH ME, AND YOU WILL BE FREE OF
THE WORLD. WHEN YOU DO SPEAK TO PEOPLE ON THE OCCASIONS IT IS FITTING, (NOT
MINDLESS CHATTING) YOU WILL REMAIN IN THE WITNESS CONSCIOUSNESS AND YOU WILL
BE A JOY TO YOURSELF, AND NON OFFENSIVE TO THE OTHER PARTY AND EVEN A
BLESSING TO THEM. AS LONG AS PEOPLE EXPRESS THEIR EGO NEEDS, THIS IS NOT
ENLIGHTENING OR FULFILLING EITHER WAY. YOU CAN DISCUSS CONCERNS AND
PROBLEMS, BUT YOU MUST BE CAREFUL TO DRAW THE LINE, TO STEP BACK FROM EGO
NEEDS.
Rasa: That can be a tricky issue of discernment at times. But you say if I
put in the hour a day, I am alright, I will be able to restrain my ego if it
tries to come forth?
MOTHERGOD: I DO PROMISE YOU THAT IF YOU DO THE HOUR A DAY YOU WILL STAY IN
THE RIGHT PLACE
Rasa: Talk to me again, Mother, about friendship and what it truly means. I
also know that this, where I am, is not for everyone, but probably more can
practice it than they realize. There are many who stay alone - widows,
singles, and others, who could do with the Word of Knowledge. They could
make use of their time better than by pining away wishing to get rid of
their loneliness through people. I do remember being in sadhanas, where
people became repulsive, as their touch, their sound, brought such
meaningless and futile thoughts and feelings, their presence sometimes
irritating and even vile. The bad sinners are filled with the stench of sin,
with lust and greed, arrogance and darkness, and it is usually they who
disrespect me the most, who look down on me the worst! People are scary.
MOTHERGOD: THE HOLINESS YOU HAVE REACHED YOU PAID A HIGH PRICE FOR, AND WHY
THROW IT AWAY ON THEM, WHICH IS WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU SPEAK TO THESE PEOPLE.
YOU LET THEM TAKE OVER YOUR 'SPACE', WHICH SHOULD BE INVIOLATE, WHICH SHOULD
BE PROTECTED AND PRIVATE. SEE YOURSELF AS THE MANSION THAT YOU ARE, A GEAT
CASTLE FILLED WITH PRECIOUS JEWELS, GOLD AND PRICELESS ARTICLES AND
FURNITURE. ALTARS ARE EVERYWHERE, THE LIGHT OF GOD, AND HER SANCTITY, IS
WITHIN. NOW CONSIDER YOURSELF OPENING THE FRONT DOOR TO PEOPLE, AND HOW FAR
WILL YOU LET THEM GO? ONLY THE MOST HOLY PEOPLE OF ALL CAN ENTER THE INNER
ROOMS, LIKE THE LADY YOU MET YESTERDAY, THE REST STAY EITHER IN THE OUTER
ROOMS, OR THE FOYER ITSELF,.SOME DO NOT ENTER THE HOUSE AT ALL, YOU YELL AT
THEM THROUGH THE WINDOW IF NEED BE, OR ELSE YOU IGNORE THEM WHEN THEY PULL
INTO THE DRIVEWAY. YOU CANNOT LET THEM INTO THE HOUSE PROPER, NOR WILL YOU
LET THEM SEE YOU WITHOUT CLOTHES, NAKED BEFORE THE LORD. YOU MUST BE COVERED
OR SURROUNDED BY THE MANTLE OF PROTECTION OF THE HOLY SPIRIT, AND CANNOT LET
THEM PENETRATE THAT VEIL.
AS SOON AS THE PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT OF THE HIGHEST LEVEL ENTER INTO YOUR SOUL
WHERE THEY DO NOT BELONG - BY YOU OPENING YOUR HEART AND MIND TO THEM - THEY
DEFILE, CLUTTER, AND BRING STENCH AND VOMIT INTO THAT HOLY PLACE. THEY
CANNOT ENTER YOUR SOUL, JUST AS THEY CANNOT ENTER INTO THE PRECINCTS OF GOD.
IF GOD WILL NOT LET THEM IN, WHY SHOULD YOU?
Rasa: Where does the mind end and the soul begin? Because I know for fact
that Satan cannot enter the Spirit, only the mind. And people - can they
actually enter the soul or is this but an allegory?
MOTHERGOD: THE SOUL IS EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU, THAT IS MIND, EMOTIONS,
CONSCIOUS AND UNCONSCIOUS MIND, BUT IT IS NOT YOUR SPIRIT/GOD. NO ONE,
EVER, CAN ENTER INTO YOUR SPIRIT/GOD BUT YOU, THAT IS THE SANCTUM
SANCTORIUM, EVER UNDEFILED.
HOWEVER, PEOPLE AND EVEN DEMONS CAN TOUCH THE SOUL, OR HUMAN PLACE, EVEN THE
UNCONSCIOUS, AND DEMONIZE, OPPRESS, POSSESS. EVIL SPIRITS EMANATE FROM
PEOPLE THROUGH THEIR WORDS AND DEEDS, IN WHAT THEY SAY AND DO NOT SAY. FOR
EXAMPLE, WHEN A PARENT OR FRIEND SHOULD GIVE A WORD OF AFFIRMATION AND THEY
WITHHOLD IT, THEY ARE ABUSING YOU BY NEGLECT. THAT IS AN EVIL SPIRIT IN
THEM, A SPIRIT AGAINST LOVE. THEY CAN PERMEATE YOUR SOUL THROUGH REPETITION
OF MALODOROUS ACTS OR WORDS, AND THEY TOUCH YOUR BRAIN PROGRAMS AND
TRAUMATIZE YOU. THESE EVIL WORMS AND VIRUSES STAY IN YOU AND ARE ROOTED OUT
BY NEW EXPERIENCES THAT ARE POSITIVE AND MUCH WORK AND INTROSPECTION. THESE
EVIL PROGRAMS ARE SO NUMEROUS, AND PERPETRATED SO OFTEN, THAT THE ENTIRE
HUMAN RACE IS FILLED WITH THEM. THEY START EVEN IN THE WOMB WITH SINNING
PARENTS, FROM THE MOMENT OF CONCEPTION. INFANTS IN THE WOMB ARE AFFECTED,
CHILDREN BEFORE THEY LEARN TO SPEAK OR READ OR WRITE ARE AFFECTED BY NEGLECT
AND SIN OF ALL SORTS, BY EVIL SPIRITS HURTING THEM. AND AS AN ADULT, YOU ARE
SURROUNDED BY ALL SORTS INCLUDING DEMONICS, AND THAT MAJORITY OF THE WORLD
WHO ARE HEADING STRAIGHT FOR HELL. YOU, A WOMAN OF GOD, MUST PROTECT
YOURSELF BY ABSENTING YOURSELF FROM THE ONSLAUGHTS OF THESE PEOPLE. WHAT
HAVE YOU TO DO WITH THEM, ANYWAY? HIT THAT DELETE BUTTON AS SOON AS THEY
COME AFTER YOU; DO NOT ANSWER THEIR PHONE CALLS.
CONSIDER WHO YOU ARE AND TELL THEM SO: YOU ARE AN ANCHORITE, A WOMAN
SEPARATED FROM THE WORLD BECAUSE OF GOD. IF THEY WANT TO SEE YOU, TOO BAD,
IT IS THEIR NEED, NOT YOURS. YOU ARE NOT GOING TO PULL A CONTEMPLATIVE NUN
OUT A MONASTERY, AND SHE IS NOT GOING TO MEET YOU AT YOUR HOUSE JUST BECAUSE
YOU WANT HER TO, ARE YOU? EVEN YOU AS A WOMAN OF GOD CAN'T GET A NUN TO DO
THAT, AND SO, WHY SHOULD ANYONE EXPECT YOU TO VISIT THEM OR VISIT YOU AS YOU
ARE IN THAT STATE? MAYBE THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND IT - THEN TELL THEM. YOU ARE
NO DIFFERENT THAN A NUN, ONLY YOU STAY IN YOUR OWN HOUSE, AND LIKE ST.
BENEDICT SAID, IT IS BETTER TO BE ALONE FOR GOD THAN TO BE IN A MONASTERY,
IT IS A HIGHER CALLING TO BE A HERMIT THAN IN A CLOISTER. THAT IS WHERE YOU
HAVE BEEN NOW FOR MANY YEARS, AND YOUR FORAYS OUTSIDE HAVE NOT BEEN FOR
PLEASURE AS MUCH AS DUTY.
GOING BACK TO THE SOUL, IN THIS SENSE, EVIL DOES ENTER THE SOUL WHEN IT
ENTERS EVEN YOUR UNCONSCIOUS MIND BY REPEATED ASSAULTS.
Rasa: And the wilderness?
MOTHERGOD: THE NUNS HAVE THEIR GARDENS AND WALLED IN PROPERTIES. I HAVE
GIVEN YOU SUCH A PLACE, WHAT IS THAT TO ANYONE? IF THEY DON'T LIKE IT OR
UNDERSTAND IT, DOES IT MATTER? JUST SO YOU DO.
Rasa: I am getting calibrated, I am seeing the Light, and it has been long
overdue. Why oh why, did I start estimating myself like a normal woman, why
have I forgotten who I am?
MOTHERGOD: HAHAHA. ONLY THAT HOUR A DAY SEPARATED YOU FROM MYSTICAL LIGHT.
NEGLECT IT AND YOU AND ALL OTHERS WHO DO SO FALL INTO MYSTICAL OCCLUSION AND
DARKNESS ENVELOPES THE MIND.
Rasa: This explains why when I abstract myself from the world and people,
being in the state of Grace and Sanctity that I am in, the Bliss enters my
Being, because it is always there, but the mystical occlusion, by way of
clutter and distraction, blocks it out. Is that how it is at this time?
MOTHERGOD: JESUS AND ALL HOLY SOULS COULD HAVE STAYED ALONE IN BLISS, BUT
THEY CHOSE TO GO OUT INTO THE WORLD AND SUFFER HARM IN ORDER TO HELP OTHERS.
BUT JESUS WAS NOT MISERABLE ALL THE TIME, MUCH OF HIS LIFE HE WAS IN A STATE
OF BLISS AND HE WAS WITH HIS HOLY MOTHER, A GREAT AVATAR, AND SHE CONSOLED
HIM. HOLY SOULS DO NOT HAVE TO BE SOILED AND PULLED DOWN ALL THE TIME; THEY
NEED REST AND NOURISHMENT JUST AS SOLDIERS HAVE TIME OFF FOR REST AND
RECREATION. WHEN YOU TRAVERSE THE WORLD YOU WILL HAVE YOUR SHARE OF TRIALS,
SO ENJOY YOUR BLISS WHILE YOU CAN AND WHEN YOU CAN.
Rasa: Now let's talk about the eighteen years in the Dark Night of the Soul
which resulted from the martyrdom of Stigmata. At that time, even though I
was Holy, I could not enjoy or experience Bliss no matter what I did. I do
understand it, but would like to hear you comment.
MOTHERGOD: WHEN A SOUL IS IN PURGATORY THEY SUFFER FROM THE LOSS OF GOD,
AND NATURALLY CANNOT ENJOY BLISS, BECAUSE GOD IS BLISS, AND WHERE GOD IS NOT
PRESENT, NEITHER CAN BLISS BE. BUT WHEN IT'S OVER, IT'S OVER. AT THAT TIME
THE DARKNESS HAS BEEN REMOVED, THE SOUL ASCENDS INTO HEAVEN AND SUFFERS NO
MORE.
Rasa: What is it within me that sometimes prevents Bliss, old habits of
worry, the guilt of being happy, like I do not deserve it, or what?
MOTHERGOD: ALL OF THE ABOVE. FACE THE ANNOYING CHORES OF LIFE, LIKE THE
DESK WORK YOU HATE, AND MAKE IT FUN. YOU CAN DO IT; IT CAN BE PAINLESS IF
YOU LET IT. SOON, AS YOU GO DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO SADHANA, IT WILL BE
PAINLESS. JUST MAKE SURE YOU DO NOT SPILL YOUR BLISS ONTO THE PIGS IN YOUR
EVERYDAY LIFE AND WASTE IT. TRY AND HOLD IT WITHIN AND SHARE IT ONLY WITH
THOSE WHO APPRECIATE IT OR REALLY NEED IT, NOT WITH EVERYONE.
Rasa: Thank you MotherGod, Amen and Glory to you Forever.
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