I THINK WHAT IS SALIENT IN THE COMING MATRIARCHY IS THAT PATRIARCHY HAS A DOUBLE STANDARD WHEREIN WHAT'S GOOD FOR THE GANDER IS BAD FOR THE GOOSE. IT'S ALL ABOUT CONTROL. PEOPLE DO HAVE MULTIPLE PARTNERS (PROBABLY MALES MORESO THAN FEMALES AS KINSEY REPORTS STATE BUT THE MALES MULTIPLES INCLUDED PROSTITUTES AND THE FEW WOMEN WHO WERE VERY OPEN TO SEX, DID LOTS OF MEN), BUT THE DOWNSIDE IS FEELING GUILT AND SHAME (MORE STIGMA UPON WOMEN'S HEARTS THAN MEN'S) -- SOMETHING THAT WOULD NOT HAPPEN IN A HEALTHY, OPEN SOCIETY THAT ADMITS THE TRUTH OF WHAT WE NEED AND WHAT WE DO.
THE TRUTH IS WE ALL WANT (AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY/BIOLOGICALLY) NEED MULTIPLE PARTNERS.
A STRONG AND INTELLIGENT WOMAN, EVEN WHEN SHE IS DOMINANT, WANTS HER MEN TO BE HAPPY AND SO SHE HAS TO UNDERSTAND THEIR INSTINCTS (AS WELL AS HER OWN) -- AND THEY CANNOT BE PERFECTLY HAPPY UNLESS THEY HAVE A VARIETY OF WOMEN.
THE NEXT QUESTION THAT COMES TO MY MIND IS:
WHY DO HUMANS WANT MULTIPLE PARTNERS?
I THINK THE ANSWER LIES IN EVOLUTIONARY PSYCHOLOGY (A NEW SCIENCE); ONE OF MY CONFRERS, DR. GALE GLAEBACH, IS A CLINICAL EVOLUTIONARY PSYCHOLOGIST AND JUST THE OTHER DAY WE SPOKE FOR THREE HOURS WHERE I LEARNED SOMETHING EXTREMELY IMPORTANT.
WILL SHARE THAT WITH YOU MOMENTARILY.
----- Original Message -----
From: Fulford Benjamin
To: Rasa Von Werder
Sent: Friday, May 23, 2008 10:15 PM
Subject: RE: ONE MORE THING
Thanks for all the e-mails. I do believe that in the future, the most common sort of union will be polysexual, that is to say groups of men and women will keep long-term relations with each other and have sex with each other in various ways. Sometimes two-somes, sometimes threesomes and sometimes moresomes. I learned that if I do not lie to women about my relations with other women, they start admitting to their relations with other men. In the end, we all become friends.
Subject: ONE MORE THING
Date: Fri, 23 May 2008 06:07:13 -0400
BEFORE I FORGET
I CAN TAKE IT BALLS DEEP
NOW BACK TO LESS SERIOUS MATTERS
From: Fulford Benjamin
To: Rasa Von Werder
Sent: Thursday, May 22, 2008 10:14 PM
Subject: RE: NO ONE COULD BE HOTTER AND LIVE
My phone does not show any sign of an incoming call at the times you mention. Please try 81-422-20-6079 or 81-90-3439-5558. I am sure you are aware of the Benjamin Franklin essay but I thought I would paste it below in case you had not read it yet.
My dear Friend,
I know of no Medicine fit to diminish the violent natural Inclinations you mention; and if I did, I think I should not communicate it to you. Marriage is the proper Remedy. It is the most natural State of Man, and therefore the State in which you are most likely to find solid Happiness. Your Reasons against entring into it at present, appear to me not well-founded. The circumstantial Advantages you have in View by postponing it, are not only uncertain, but they are small in comparison with that of the Thing itself, the being married and settled. It is the Man and Woman united that make the compleat human Being. Separate, she wants his Force of Body and Strength of Reason; he, her Softness, Sensibility and acute Discernment. Together they are more likely to succeed in the World. A single Man has not nearly the Value he would have in that State of Union. He is an incomplete Animal. He resembles the odd Half of a Pair of Scissars. If you get a prudent healthy Wife, your Industry in your Profession, with her good Economy, will be a Fortune sufficient.
But if you will not take this Counsel, and persist in thinking a Commerce with the Sex inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice, that in all your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones. You call this a Paradox, and demand my Reasons. They are these:
1. Because as they have more Knowledge of the World and their Minds are better stor’d with Observations, their Conversation is more improving and more lastingly agreable. 2. Because when Women cease to be handsome, they study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Men, they supply the Diminution of Beauty by an Augmentation of Utility. They learn to do a 1000 Services small and great, and are the most tender and useful of all Friends when you are sick. Thus they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such a thing to be found as an old Woman who is not a good Woman.
3. Because there is no hazard of Children, which irregularly produc’d may be attended with much Inconvenience.
4. Because thro’ more Experience, they are more prudent and discreet in conducting an Intrigue to prevent Suspicion. The Commerce with them is therefore safer with regard to your Reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be rather inclin’d to excuse an old Woman who would kindly take care of a young Man, form his Manners by her good Counsels, and prevent his ruining his Health and Fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.
5. Because in every Animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.
6. Because the Sin is less. The debauching a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her for Life unhappy.
7. Because the Compunction is less. The having made a young Girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflections; none of which can attend the making an old Woman happy.
8thly and Lastly They are so grateful!!
Thus much for my Paradox. But still I advise you to marry directly; being sincerely Your affectionate Friend.